Revision

  I chose this assignment because I believed that it could use a revision. The original assignment description required that I write about an innovation that has changed a long standing tradition. I decided to use Facebook as the innovation that morphed the tradition of phone and e-mail use. Some of the strengths in my writing were detailed comparisons of old ways versus the new trends. I believe my essay had good examples that were strongly supported. Weaknesses of the paper included not writing a conclusion. The paper just ends without any sort of attempt to wrap things up. Also, I believe the topic may not have perfectly fit with the assignment. A final weakness of the paper was that along with the conclusion, a lot of points were missing or were not described as well as they could have been. For the revision, I added more detail and examples and created a sound conclusion.